I seek the light--------------------------------------------------------------------
© Copyright 2005 Lawrence A. McFadden • All rights reserved




be kind

follow your heart

learn to be true

learn i love you

know your charms

find your grace

reach peace

every step a dance

each breath

an inspiration

in the wake

of your day

dream



_________________________________



like the life of a leaf

i wander and roam

finding my way home

welcome home

underfeet a leaf under

stood undercovers under

wonder through the blue

enchantment

of you being amused

with a smile across

the sky as wide as

your mind

widemind under

wonder a hum a chant

a prayer a naked laugh

aware to rest here

with you because

you understand

the life of a leaf



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in the sky

in the quiet chaos

of the clouds i am asked

through whose eyes do i see

i relive every consequence

of my life in my exploration

of life as i walk this forest

floor of the underworld

i am like the bare trees

in my poverty of empty

arms reaching reaching

for an answer more more

than i don't know

my question of the sky

i dream of all these

years in preparation

of what responsibility

i am not allowed to seek

into the future



_________________________________



yes

again i could not see

the harm in my wants

i tried to become

something other

than human

and wanted to be something

i saw others become

instead of being

myself



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i am weak

with an inner

strength like a bear

in winter hides like

the stars in the sky

my strength is there

with you

look for power and i

will be gone look

for love and love

endlessly

in my dreams

of you this bliss

streams from my eyes

in a river to this world

within the words

i love you



_________________________________



use me my muse

i find you in my thoughts

here and now

i find you in my heart

and soul

blessed with bliss

i feel you and i feel

forever

i feel you feel me

our esctasy

use me my muse

my joy my shadow

my sisters create

me



_________________________________



you are the chime

of the wind the spirit

of the flock the medicine

of my path

i know you've understood

you know i've done

the best i could

may i touch you

with your love

and feel for forever

in the moments we are

together when we are

the bridge of our being



_________________________________



say i hear

you don't listen

i feel your words

from every direction

and distance

i watch what i say

and what it might

mean

and know

there is no silence

left unsaid no word

unspoken

through these worlds

of words each illusion

every time i hear

listen here



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like a child

i was reminded

by the snow tonight

of when i was

with you when the snow

was our light and i felt

the calm the stillness

the sound of falling

flake and i cannot help

the grin i get with a beard

full of the hush of snow

this bliss this gift this bow

i saw god many times

again for the first time

i was shown creation

in silence in rhyme

in presence

i rejoice

in you the voice

the spirit the snow



_________________________________



april

showers

broken arrows

love is the greatest

power there is

nothing sacred

in hate

the rain the fire

darkness light

the truth the spirit

the might of life

a wisdom

calling

do you know

what you have

done



_________________________________



i do not remember

the sound of the first

drum i did not see

the first rainbow

yet every time the beat

occurs the sight appears

everlasting and sacred

again i hear the flutter

of feathers i felt again

within my being the dove

your spirit of peace

and love and prophesy

you give me rainbow tribe

eyes medicine of the bow

and healing hands full

of hope and braided desire

to seek the light the beam

through her dreams

through this world

through the bridge

of our being one

of her children one

of her drums one

of her doves



_________________________________



so long

i've been gone

out of my head

out of my words

out of this world

in my dreams

where snow is fire

and the word soul

is a verb spoken

with desire

call me crazy

of course i'm insane

taught to fear and dread

to heal instead

listen to your heart

hear your love

root

she is calling you

with love with light

with peace within

the spirit of earth



_________________________________



in the woods of the soul

in the forest of our church

where time is an eternity

each day i keep close

to the fire i keep close

to my heart

and have great

talk and laughter

and i will dream

in ecstasy tonight

in the colors of my life

in the sounds of my love

in flight to heal

my wounds my strife

my brothers my sisters

on this journey a path

of medicine and light



_________________________________



to soar in spirit

with the blackbird

raven crow and buzzard

birds of majick and mystery

birds of creation and rebirth

to those who have died

many times deep within

my cry in here clear

and alive and i wander

why in wonder in awe

sometimes awefully glad

awefully sad awefully mad

awefully blessed to die

these lives these ego deaths

to empty me to be with spirit

within selflessly in

purpose and creation

a celebration

of feathers



_________________________________



gone

i stay behind

and tend the fire

as evening mends

the afternoon

i think of you

and my tears

become jewels

of solitude and

these words are

heart and soul

close to you

as light as a feather

as you read this

perhaps i will hear

the morning dove

and again think

of you at dusk

and at dawn

you can see my

smile my gleam

i sing this song

to you as we

rejoice on the

path we share



_________________________________



mother god

in vien

christ i fell

in love

with everyone

of you

i want to hear

every variation

i want to feel

every vibration

i see our love

in every dream

that comes true

your tiny truths

the spirit

that helps me

through my days

sister jesus

please teach me

with your wisdom

what is hidden

in the darkness

of our lives

may we light

the world again

with love



_________________________________



back in again in the in sane asylum

and the first crazy to talk to me

tells how venus has a moon

in the shape of a teardrop

i needed the rain to wash me

i needed pain to stop me

black ice

the spirit did not leave me

and a late snowflake melted

on the tip of my nose

one flew east

one flew west

all are blessed

in the cuckoo's nest

Amen



_________________________________



look up

where trees wander

and circle the sky

without sacrifice

i would not be

hear within

this womb this seed

in the earth in deed

your garden of dreams

my life still nourished

with your ecstasy

till



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i swallowed the black sky

the moon a pearl upon

my tongue melting me

into your dream

i may not sleep this night

nor the next and i did

not sleep the last

did i miss

the early morning mists

where there are no definitions

where there are no meanings

where only reason can go

in a time of truth

i feel this moment

becomes every moment

every where when

i know i don't know

i hear you'll see



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i remember my mind

white with roar

in a vessel designed

for war deep in crave

far from shore

still this bright spring

day haunts me more

the want of you

i am not sure

my strength is yours

i ask myself my whys

to the poet truth

is my guide i sigh

another ocean my path

of yours the depths

of devotion



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intuitively

i throw away everything

in my head like a garage sale

sleeping with only truth

and compassion looking

for love i wander all day

the emptiness and wonder

of all night alone i make

god laugh trying to figure

out why i have this need

for you to complete me

superman underdog

both and neither

when i see you dream

the sight brings me

peace one heart

when i wait for you

to awaken this time

brings me light

one might smile truely

filling my eyes with

glee deeply your laugh

nourishing me when

i dream you are real

spiralling with me

in this dream need

must i roam

alone



_________________________________



the edge of knowledge

where warriors worry

certainly a uncertainty

like a tattoo trust

like a tool love

like life laugh

you are the wild orchid

the purple iris the dandylion

unique in every shadow

every ray every step

along your way each

peek to dream and

awaken to dream

and awaken to dream

and awaken to become

a song to be sung

a hum in the perfection

of light and the surrender

of the night



_________________________________



your lesson of many

sessions a habitual

ritual of light and love

the reach of peace the

worth of verse the proof

of truth the math of

path heal the feel feel

the heal glow the soul

say the ray speak the

peek map the sap here

hear art the heart ask

the task mine the mind

seek the peaks walk the

talk strive to thrive this

is why i search this is

why i wander this is why

i wonder this is why my

name is a flame



_________________________________



happily

on the outskirts

close to the thread

the fringe of your

dream i can enhance

the chance the creation

the trance the mystery

that sustains the spirit

the love the light within

with kindness i can find

ways to heal with joy

i can find ways to

celebrate with you

i can find ways

to awaken



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these full moon summer

solstice nights are teaching me

the right ways to be wrong

the crazy ways weakness

can be strong and i become

suspicious of my suspicions

i have held for so long

in the darkness of my heart

yes a cry is heard from

within to face the moon

and taste a tear for this tiny

night a shake of the vibe

of my life a hum that i am

not done a sum of all

my fears in the leap of light

from the sun to the moon

deep into my eyes deep into

the night deep into delight

deep into flight



_________________________________



you can see

in my words

i seek the light

with my words

i seek the spirit

mother may i

this blessed art

of heart and feather

i hear my father call

strong and distant

timelessly sacredly

knowingly

now as ancient

as the alphabet

i feel my soul

feel my bliss

i feel you can

so clearly see me

you laugh

at yourselves